Adam Crapser's mother in Korea is desperately trying to to learn English, knowing the son she gave up for adoption in 1978 is about to be deported from the United States.

The New York Times interviewed Kwon Pil-ju, now 61, about what she calls her "unforgivable sin" of allowing her son, then three, to be adopted by Americans. A sister also was adopted.

She thought Crapser would have a better life than what she could provide. Her hope never became a reality.

“I know it sounds like an excuse, but I had no one to turn to for help,” she told the Times.

Read the heart wrenching Times story of her life

After seven years Crapser and his older sister were abandoned by their adoptive parents. The foster care system separated Crapser when he was 10 from his sister.

He was housed at several foster and group homes. When Crapser was 12, he moved in with Thomas and Dolly Crapser, their biological son, two other adoptees and several foster children.

There, he was physically abused, Crapser has said. In 1991, the couple was arrested on charges of physical child abuse, sexual abuse and rape. They denied the charges. Thomas Crapser's sentence included 90 days in jail, and Dolly Crasper's included three years of probation.

More: Adopted to U.S., Korean man to be deported

Adam Crapser got into trouble with the law after he broke into his parents' home - it was, he said, to retrieve the Korean Bible and rubber shoes that came with him from the orphanage - and later it was for stealing cars and assaulting a roommate.

He went on with his life, eventually marrying and having children. Crapser found himself this fall in a Tacoma detention center on a menacing investigation involving his family.

Crapser recently gave up the effort to remain in America. He arrived in Korea on Thursday.

"Remember, Eomma, I an always your son, your flesh and blook," he said a TV documentary aired in Korea.

Kwon Pil-ju has set aside a small room in her home for her son.

“I have never imagined that he was having this hard life of his,” she said, wiping away tears. “I should have kept him even if we starved together. What I did was an unforgivable sin.”